Almost two months ago he called to say hello and talk about a mutual friend who came to visit me. It wasn't weird for us to talk, on the contrary it felt normal and familiar which made it somewhat harder. We spoke of a number of things, from friends to films, all of which topics had no major importance, but seemed dire at the time, spilling out of our mouths as fast as possible to keep the conversation going. It lasted for four hours. The next morning I woke up early to talk about it with Megan before she left for Boston. Smiling like I had my first kiss, I tried to figure out what happened. I felt different, like I had a secret, and I didn't want to let it go.
The phone calls became more frequent and accustomed . We never addressed the past or what could have been. Going from hardly speaking in four months to conversing almost every night was dangerous, yes, but encouraged. A part of me feared being hurt again, yet another craved to hear his voice.
After a visit and unplanned talk things became more serious and I contemplated what I wanted and if it was worth going back. It was and it is. And so, six nights later, after nights of whispered reassurances and compliments that made me smile for hours too long, things were agreed on. With giggling voices, hearts open wide, and knowing that what we were doing was right, we agreed that this time it would be better.
It's been almost six months since Samir and I broke up. But like the old adage says, time heals all wounds, or even so, absence makes the heart grow fonder. We each made some mistakes in the past. We each know what went wrong and what we can work on. But with that knowledge comes hope and optimism. We've changed and the distance was helpful. Now, as we restart our relationship, I have nothing but faith.
They say you can't go back to the past, and yes, that may be true. But you can always start from where you left off. This time knowing that you can make it work. And, ultimately, this time, as girly as it may sound, being very, very excited.
5 comments:
Oh hun! I wish you lots of luck!
And they say the only way really to ever get beyond a relationship to begin a new one is to do exactly that. Leave the past where it is and see where you are in the present.
this is so exciting! is it proper to congratulate you? haha.
i have a lot of friends that have had a short break up and then ended up getting married (not to rush into anything, ha), but you get what i mean.
Alexa is planning the wedding already? I shall be the band.
I hope your guests like a lot of Kelly Clarkson.
We should all take advantage of learning from our mistakes and keeping an open mind about all things important to us ... From what I've read, I feel your mind is in the right place and you are about to travel the right path.
It's quite possible that I am confusing all of this, but Samir is the boy that you broke up with and this somehow caused you to start this blog, right?
My general rule is a person is an ex for a reason. That being said, I wish you the absolute best.
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